Secondary Market Annuity | Pawn It Like a Gold Chain

Today we be talking Secondary Market Annuity. A Secondary Market Annuity is Not an Annuity or so I read from The Dawg.  Basically what happens is when young brothas get chumped by some rich dudes from Florida, they pawn it off like a fuckin’ gold chain man., except a judge has to approve the deal.  And the muthafukkaz that be chumping your sorry ass know which court to go to get to you know, get the thing done without too much lookey see. You think that structured settlement be worth $3 million. Well guess what, in Las Olas it’s worth 50 bucks, maybe a little more on 165th Street, you know “past that mall” from Funkin 4 Jamaica. Actually it ain’t THAT bad, but it’s pretty effin’ bad. When you sell your structured settlement payments to buy some bling, some rich folks, they gonna sing.  Before I get to my latest Funky “Poultrified” Rap you may want to check out this great article by David Bakee called 7 Things You Should and Shouldn’t Buy From a Pawn Shop.

Secondary Market Annuity

A Really Great Opportunity

pawn shop
Young brotha “pawns off” structured settlement and it gets re-sold as a Secondary Market Annuity

That’s In The Community

And So It Gleams

Like The Gold Chain

Bought for Mary Jane

When You Was in Spain

Singin in Rain


Like Fred Astaire

Your ass is threadbare

There ain’t nothing there

Not like in 2008

When you called Gair Gair


Chester the investor

All dressed in Polyester

Dances to  Sylvester

Takes 10 mg of Crestor

And bought the new zester

As a kind gesture

Cuz his wife was a pester

Thought he was a jester


All kidding aside

If the rules they do abide

No funny business tried

Won’t fall on your backside

Or left chewing rawhide.


Secondary Market Annuity

There ain’t no ambiguity

There ain’t no superfluity

If you’ve got the acuity

Investor can make a nice gratuity









Published by FunkyChicken

I love funky music, lyrical poetry and the "rhyme sublime". A rapper with an interest in structured settlements. I read about too many brothers and sisters getting hosed by advertisers buying structured settlements. Having to sell your structured settlement sucks, but many people don't have the access to the information they need and making bad decisions, so I decided to rap home the message.

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